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WORDS YOU DON'T HEAR ANYMORE. 9/15/2010 Be sure to refill the ice trays, we're going to have company. Watch for the postman, I want to get this letter to Willie in the mail today . Quit slamming the screen door when you go out ! Be sure and 0 Comments, 15 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Enjoy 8/25/2010 1. She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little 0 Comments, 117 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Some pretty cute ones here. ENJOY ! 6/20/2010 Some 'Senior' personal ads seen in ''theVillages'' Florida newspapers  Who says seniors don't have a sense of
humor?) FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4' 0 Comments, 75 Views, 0 Votes | |
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THE OLDER CROWD 6/11/2010 THE OLDER CROWD A distraught senior citizen Phoned her doctor's office. 'Is it true, ' she wanted to know, 'that the medication You prescribed has to be taken For the rest of my life?' 'Yes, 0 Comments, 39 Views, 0 Votes | |
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locked her keys in the car 5/26/2010 > A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small > was very sick with a fever. > > > She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication. > > > She got back to her 0 Comments, 104 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Purity 4/14/2010 A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they are eating breakfast, The young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean", she said. 0 Comments, 78 Views, 0 Votes | |
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NEW CORVETTE CONVERTIBLE 3/9/2010 A FLORIDA SENIOR CITIZEN HAPPILY DROVE HIS BRAND NEW CORVETTE CONVERTIBLE OUT OF THE DEALERSHIP....TAKING OFF DOWN THE ROAD, HE FLOORED IT TO 80 MPH, ENJOYING THE WIND BLOWING THROUGH WHAT LITTLE HAI 0 Comments, 86 Views, 0 Votes | |
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DID GOD MAKE ME? 3/8/2010 Grandpa and granddaughter were sitting talking when she asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?" "Yes, God made me, " the grandfather answered. A few minutes later, the little girl asked 0 Comments, 97 Views, 0 Votes | |
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It could be you. 2/5/2010 $5.37. That's what the behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me. I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having alread 0 Comments, 60 Views, 0 Votes | |
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And so it goes...... 1/27/2010 A group of 40 years old buddies discuss and discuss where they should meet for dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Gausthof zum Lowen restaurant because the waitress's there 0 Comments, 45 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Over the hill 1/24/2010 OVER THE HILL You know you are over hill when .... 1. You and your teeth don't sleep together. 2. You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren' 0 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
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One more time 1/20/2010 IN CHURCH 3-year-old Reese : 'Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen.' ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A little boy was overheard praying: 'Lord, if yo 0 Comments, 24 Views, 0 Votes | |
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RETIREMENT 1/9/2010 If you are planning retirement, let me share retirement experiences with you, which I hope will be helpful. Fifteen years ago my wife and I moved into a retirement 0 Comments, 49 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Observations on Growing Older 12/10/2009 Observations on Growing Older ~Your are becoming you...and you don't like them ...but your grandchildren are perfect! ~Going out is good. Coming home is better! ~When people say you 0 Comments, 9 Views, 0 Votes | |
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GRANDMA’S 12/4/2009 I was out walking with my 4-year -old Grand . She picked up something off of the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that. 'Why 0 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Well my job is done 12/3/2009 Senior Road Trip While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving, the e 0 Comments, 39 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Church humor 12/2/2009 =========== A father was approached by his small who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?" The replied, 0 Comments, 36 Views, 0 Votes | |
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FIRST VISIT TO CHURCH 11/28/2009 A mother took her three-year-old to church for the first time. The church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the littl 0 Comments, 26 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Forgetter Be Forgotten? 11/19/2009 My forgetter's getting better, But my rememberer is broke To you that may seem funny But, to me, that is no joke For when I'm 'here' I'm wondering If I really should be 'there' And, when I tr 0 Comments, 1 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Senior Moments 10/31/2009 Though I walk through The Valley of Senior Moments for my Senior Discount Card is with me. A pair of Reading Glasses in each Room shall comfort me. Shall follow me all the days of my life In the rest 0 Comments, 18 Views, 0 Votes | |
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BIBLICAL BUMPER STICKERS 10/12/2009 BIBLICAL BUMPER STICKERS Adam: "You are what you eat." Eve: "At least he doesn't compare me to his mother." Abraham: "I'm goin' not knowin'." Noah: "Honk if you bel 0 Comments, 18 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Old Ben Franklin Knew 10/10/2009 These names of virtues, with their precepts, were: 1. TEMPERANCE. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation. 2. SILENCE. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversatio 0 Comments, 1 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Someone Else 10/7/2009 SOMEONE ELSE Our church was saddened to learn this week of the death of one of our most valued members, Someone Else. Someone's passing creates a vacancy that will be difficult to fi 0 Comments, 1 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Life Explained 10/2/2009 > > > A boat docked in a tiny Mexican fishing village. > A tourist complimented the local fishermen on the quality of their fish and > asked how long it took him to catch them. > > > "Not very long." 0 Comments, 8 Views, 0 Votes | |
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The Talking Centipede 9/25/2009 The Talking Centipede A single guy decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet After 0 Comments, 26 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Differences 9/13/2009 Have you ever wondered what the difference between Grandmothers and Grandfathers is? Well here it is: A friend, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his famil 0 Comments, 26 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Public Service Message 9/12/2009 Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling AAA is not an option. I will win. _______________________________________ 0 Comments, 2 Views, 0 Votes | |
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Pray for Leroy 8/24/2009 "Anyone with needs to be prayed over, come forward, to the front at the altar, " the Preacher says. Leroy gets in line, and when it's his turn, the preacher asks: "Leroy, what do you want me to pray a 0 Comments, 32 Views, 0 Votes | |
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But here's the worst of it 8/19/2009 IF MY BODY WERE A CAR... If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish, and my paint 0 Comments, 16 Views, 0 Votes | |
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TELLING SOME STORIES 8/1/2009 TELLING SOME STORIES Delivering a speech at a banquet on the night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day. < 0 Comments, 6 Views, 0 Votes |
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