High altitude Pancakes
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Posted:Dec 16, 2013 3:23 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2013 9:54 am 2272 Views
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A tried and true Wyoming pioneer recipe... Enjoy!
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High altitude Pancakes
Like them to melt in your mouth? Try this recipe. Serve them hot off the griddle.
Use a hot, lightly greased griddle.
Makes eight 5 inch pancakes, or fourteen 3 inch pancakes.
for 5,000 feet to 7,000 feet
Ingredients:
- 2 C sifted all purpose flour
- 2 tsp. double acting baking powder
- 1 tsp. salt
- 2 eggs
- 1/4 C sugar
- 1-3/4 C milk
- 1/4 C melted fat or cooking oil
- 1/2 tsp. vanilla [optional, but recommended]
Directions:
1. Sift flour, then measure. Add baking powder to the flour and sift into medium sized mixing bowl. Set aside.
2. Beat eggs with rotary hand beater until foamy. Add sugar and beat a few seconds. Stir in milk and shortening.
3. Pour egg and milk mixture into flour mixture. Stir just enough to moisten flour.
4. Preheat lightly greased griddle or skillet. When a few drops of water sprinkled on the surface bounce and sputter, the temperature is right.
5. Pour or spoon batter onto cooking surface in the amount for the desired pancake size. When the top of the pancake is covered with bursting bubbles, turn the pancake over. Turn only once.
6. Serve immediately.
The amount of milk added determines the thickness of the pancakes. 1 1/2 C milk results in thick pancakes. 2 C makes them thin.
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5
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Cat bathing as a martial art
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Posted:Dec 12, 2013 8:35 am
Last Updated:Dec 13, 2013 1:56 pm 2294 Views
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Here's an 'oldie but goodie. It has the style of Dave Barry, but sadly I don't know who wrote it. Enjoy!
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CAT BATHING AS A MARTIAL ART
Some people say cats never have to be bathed. They say cats lick themselves clean. They say cats have a special enzyme of some sort in their saliva that works like new, improved Wisk... dislodging the dirt where it hides and whisking it away.
I've spent most of my life believing this folklore. Like most blind believers, I've been able to discount all the facts to the contrary, the kitty odors that lurk in the corners of the garage and dirt smudges that cling to the throw rug by the fireplace.
The time comes, however, when a man must face reality: when he must look squarely in the face of massive public sentiment to the contrary and announce: "This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez."
When that day arrives at your house, as it has in mine, I have some advice you might consider as you place your feline friend under your arm and head for the bathtub:
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Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)
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Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. I recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.
- Prepare everything in advance. There is no time to go out for a towel when you have a cat digging a hole in your flak jacket. Draw the water. Make sure the bottle of kitty shampoo is inside the glass enclosure. Make sure the towel can be reached, even if you are lying on your back in the water.
- Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule. If he does notice your garb, calmly explain that you are taking part in a product testing experiment for J.C. Penney.)
- Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.
- Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)
- Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared to what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. You
simply pop the drain plug with you foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.)
After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.
In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psycho-ceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.
You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath.
But at least now he smells a lot better.
(source unknown)
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1
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turkey season
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Posted:Dec 3, 2013 3:08 pm
Last Updated:Dec 4, 2013 9:10 pm 2140 Views
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It's turkey season, and I shot my first one.
Scared the hell out of the people at the frozen meat section, however.
Sure is fun being a senior citizen!
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0
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The ventriloquist
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Posted:Nov 30, 2013 10:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 1, 2013 8:28 am 2155 Views
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A ventriloquist is doing a show in a small town.
With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes.
Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair & starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes! What makes you think you can stereotype blonde women that way? What does the color of a woman's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's men like you who keep women like me from being respected at work & in the community, & from reaching our full potential as people. It’s people like you that make others think that all Blondes are dumb! You & your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general ... pathetically all in the name of humor!"
The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, but the blonde yells out, "You stay out of this! I'm talking to that little bastard on your knee!"
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1
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when I get old, I'm going to...
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Posted:Nov 27, 2013 2:08 pm
Last Updated:Nov 30, 2013 6:30 am 2172 Views
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When I get old, I'm going to move in with my ,
hog the computer,
pay no bills,
eat all of the food,
trash the house,
and when asked to clean,
pitch a fit like it's going to kill me!
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2
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unannounced dinner arrival incident
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Posted:Nov 21, 2013 8:42 am
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2013 12:22 pm 2095 Views
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A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 5:30 after work.
His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and listens in.
"My hair is in curlers, no makeup, the house is a mess, the dishes aren't done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the hell did you bring him?"
"Because he's thinking about getting married."
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2
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Exercise For Seniors
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Posted:Nov 3, 2013 3:33 pm
Last Updated:Nov 9, 2013 12:05 pm 2042 Views
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Exercise For Seniors
Just came across this exercise for seniors to build muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems easy, so I'm passing it on. The article suggested doing it three days a week.
Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 5 lb. potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides, then hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, then relax.
Each day, you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10 lb. potato sacks. Then 50 lb. potato sacks and, eventually, try to get to where you can lift a 100 lb. potato sack in each and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.
After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks, but be careful...
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3
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real world news item - 10 reasons to give up diet soda
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Posted:Oct 29, 2013 11:58 am
Last Updated:Oct 31, 2013 1:38 pm 2104 Views
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10 reasons to give up diet soda
By Mary Squillace
October 29, 2013
Health.com
When taken at face value, diet soda seems like a health-conscious choice. It saves you the 140-plus calories you'd find in a sugary soft drink while still satisfying your urge for something sweet with artificial sweeteners like aspartame, saccharin, and sucralose. But there's more to this chemical cocktail than meets the eye.
It confuses your body:
Artificial sweeteners have more intense flavor than real sugar, so over time products like diet soda dull our senses to naturally sweet foods like fruit, says Dr. Brooke Alpert, author of The Sugar Detox. Even more troubling, these sugar stand-ins have been shown to have the same effect on your body as sugar. "Artificial sweeteners trigger insulin, which sends your body into fat storage mode and leads to weight gain," Alpert says.
It could lead to weight gain, not weight loss:
Diet soda is calorie-free, but it won't necessarily help you lose weight. Researchers from the University of Texas found that over the course of about a decade, diet soda drinkers had a 70 percent greater increase in waist circumference compared with non-drinkers. And get this: participants who slurped down two or more sodas a day experienced a 500 percent greater increase. The way artificial sweeteners confuse the body may play a part, but another reason might be psychological, says Minnesota-based dietitian Cassie Bjork. When you know you're not consuming any liquid calories, it might be easier to justify that double cheeseburger or extra slice of pizza.
It's associated with an increased risk of type 2 diabetes:
Drinking one diet soda a day was associated with a 36 percent increased risk of metabolic syndrome and diabetes in a University of Minnesota study. Metabolic syndrome describes a cluster of conditions (including high blood pressure, elevated glucose levels, raised cholesterol, and large waist circumference) that put people at high risk for heart disease, stroke, and diabetes, Bjork explains.
It has no nutritional value:
When you drink diet soda, you're not taking in any calories—but you're also not swallowing anything that does your body any good, either. The best no-calorie beverage? Plain old water, says Bjork. "Water is essential for many of our bodily processes, so replacing it with diet soda is a negative thing," she says. If it's the fizziness you crave, try sparkling water.
Its sweetener is linked to headaches:
Early studies on aspartame and anecdotal evidence suggests that this artificial sweetener may trigger headaches in some people. "I have several who used to suffer from migraines and pinpointed their cause to diet soda," Bjork says.
It'll ruin your smile over time:
Excessive soda drinking could leave you looking like a Breaking Bad extra, according to a case study published in the journal General Dentistry. The research compared the mouths of a cocaine-user, a methamphetamine-user, and a habitual diet-soda drinker, and found the same level of tooth erosion in each of them. The culprit here is citric acid, which weakens and destroys tooth enamel over time.
It makes drinking more dangerous:
Using diet soda as a low-calorie cocktail mixer has the dangerous effect of getting you drunk faster than sugar-sweetened beverages, according to research from Northern Kentucky University. The study revealed that participants who consumed cocktails mixed with diet drinks had a higher breath alcohol concentration than those who drank alcohol blended with sugared beverages. The researchers believe this is because our bloodstream is able to absorb artificial sweetener more quickly than sugar.
It's associated with depression:
A recent study presented at a the American Academy of Neurology meeting found that over the course of 10 years, people who drank more than four cups or cans of soda a day were 30 percent more likely to develop depression than those who steered clear of sugary drinks. The correlation held true for both regular and diet drinks, but researchers were sure to note that the risk appeared to be greater for those who primarily drank diet sodas and fruit punches. Although this type of study can't prove cause and effect, its findings are worth considering.
It may be bad for your bones:
Women over 60 are already at a greater risk for osteoporosis than men, and Tufts University researchers found that drinking soda, including diet soda, compounds the problem. They discovered that female cola drinkers had nearly 4 percent lower bone mineral density in their hips than women who didn't drink soda. The research even controlled for the participants' calcium and vitamin D intake. Additionally, a 2006 study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition found that cola intake (all kinds, not just diet) was associated with low bone-mineral density in women.
It may hurt your heart:
Just one diet soft drink a day could boost your risk of having a vascular event such as stroke, heart attack or vascular death, according to researchers from the University of Miami and Columbia University. Their study found that diet soda devotees were 43 percent more likely to have experienced a vascular event than those who drank none. Regular soda drinkers did not appear to have an increased risk of vascular events. Researchers say more studies need to be conducted before definitive conclusions can be made about diet soda's effects on health.
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2
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You know you are drinking too much coffee if...
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Posted:Oct 25, 2013 7:01 pm
Last Updated:Oct 26, 2013 9:37 am 2052 Views
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an oldie but a goodie... have a good laugh!
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YOU KNOW YOU’RE DRINKING TOO MUCH COFFEE IF:
Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
Your answer the door before people knock.
You haven’t blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
You have completed another sweater, and you don’t know how to knit.
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You watch videos in fast-forward.
The only time you’re standing still is during an earthquake.
You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.
You lick your coffeepot clean.
You spend every vacation visiting “Maxwell House”.
You’re the employee of the month at the local coffeehouse and you don’t even work there.
Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
You chew on other people’s fingernails.
The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
Your T-shirt says, “Decaffeinated coffee is the devil’s coffee".
You’re so jittery that people use your hands to blend their margaritas.
You don’t sweat, you percolate.
You’ve worn out the handle on your coffee mug.
You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it’s not plugged in.
You’ve built a miniature city out of little creamer stir sticks.
People get dizzy just watching you sit.
You’ve worn the finish off your coffee table.
The Taster’s Choice couple wants to adopt you.
Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
Your life’s goal is to amount to a hill of beans.
You can channel surf faster without a remote.
Someone says, “How are you?”, and you reply, “Good to the last drop.”
You want to be cremated and buried in a coffee can.
Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
You’re offended when people use the word “brew” to mean beer.
You named your cats “Cream” and “Sugar”.
Your thermos is on wheels.
Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
You think being called a “drip” is a compliment.
You don’t suntan; you roast.
You don’t get mad, you get steamed.
You can’t ever remember your second cup.
You help your chase its tail.
You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate.
You think CPR stands for “Coffee Provides Resuscitation.”
Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.
You use coffee to escape from your problems.
You eat spoonfuls of instant coffee because it’s faster.
You have, on occasion, awakened in a puddle of your own coffee.
It’s easier to drink more coffee than go to sleep.
You have drunk cold coffee.
You have drunk cold coffee right out of the pot.
You have drunk cold coffee from a cup you found Monday morning at work.
You spend more than 20% of your income on coffee and/or coffee related products.
Your coffee cup resembles a beer stein, including size.
Someone has told you, “you have a problem”.
North American Indians call you “Ona mac towanda” (Breath smells-like-coffee).
You have sold personal or possessions of others just to get your fix for the day.
The phrase “Swiss coffee substitute” strike terror into your heart.
You have a coffee maker in more than one room of your house.
You have a coffee maker in more than five rooms.
You have a coffee maker in your bathroom.
The people at Coffee World refuse to give you free coffee cards anymore.
The Drug Enforcement Unit raided your house only to find you grow your own coffee.
You burn out more than one coffee pot a year.
You blamed the coffee pot burnout on a lightning strike.
You salivate uncontrollably whenever you hear dripping water.
Sleep is only a hobby.
Sleep is difficult because your eyes are always open.
You can thread a sewing machine while it is running.
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old fashioned?
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Posted:Oct 22, 2013 12:49 pm
Last Updated:Oct 23, 2013 12:48 pm 2010 Views
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I can't believe it. My girlfriend called me 'old fashioned', and her ankle was exposed... the slut.
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