| Blogs > shuel2002 > Speak Your Mind |
|
Double Standards There are definitely double standards regarding females versus males. Here is a list I found of the top 5 things that women are looked down on for, when men aren't: for the same things: 1. Having "too many" sexual partners. While no-one's "number" should matter, the sexual double standard is alive and well. Men who sleep around are "studs," but women who do the same are "sluts." What's more, a disturbing study found that women labelled "promiscuous" were rejected by their male and female peers, which is all kinds of messed up. 2. Having a messy home. Though an estimated 81 percent of men and 87 percent of women report feeling anxious about home upkeep, women still do the majority of the housework. Why? Because women are judged much more harshly than men for having a messy home. We like the attitude HuffPost blogger Claire McCarthy shared in her Feb. 25 post: "We have more important things to do. If there is some time left over after we talk, eat together, play together and finish this really great book, we'll clean. If not, well, it can wait." 3. Being overweight. Though both men and women experience fat prejudice, studies have found that overweight women feel more societal pressure to lose weight than overweight men. 4. Being blunt or assertive. A woman who speaks her mind too much is deemed bossy, aggressive or arrogant -- whereas a mouthy dude is simply showcasing his executive leadership skills. 5. Not having . Childfree women are often referred to as "selfish" and told they will regret their decision not to have . Because what kind of unnatural woman would never want to be a mother? Men get no such flak -- being a dad isn't considered to be an essential part of manhood. Plus, men have way more time to decide if they want ! (But they still have biological clocks, too.) What do you think of double standards and have you noticed others not on the list? I haven't done too well on the top 5 list myself. Thankfully, my boyfriend feels that women should have the same standards as men. That's why I love him.  There is something I want to mention that is unrelated to this topic. ET wrote on someone's blog yesterday that one should only put one (or 2?) posts a day out of courtesy. I'm banned from that post so I couldn't reply to her comment there. I can only watch that post. I don't get what ET wrote for 2 reasons. One, I've seen others post many times a day, including ET on rare occasions. Secondly, I wrote a post about what is blog etiquette for this site. I didn't want to offend anyone and the overwhelming answer was there were no rules. Nobody said anything about one or two posts maximum a day. ET, if you read this, please clarify. I want you to know I would have just answered on the other post, had I been allowed to. This in no way is intended to offend you in any way. I just want to understand.    Elaine Shuel |
|||
|
Funny!
| ||
3/19/2015 4:31 pm |
Hard for me to say. Although my life choices were influenced by sexual stereotypes I never had any difficulty being a woman and getting or doing what I wanted to do. As I look at the younger generation (my grands and nieces) the playing field appears to be pretty even. 2 are in college, one on engineering and the other in pre med on full scholarships and the youngest has received recognition for her academic achievement in science and math. The numbers and frequency of blogs is an often debated topic. Some bloggers feel we should be courteous and give everyone a chance to be seen on the main page while others crank out several a for recognition. You're d©@##ed if you and d@##ed if you don't. Me? I share things, usually no more than one a day because I have many other things needing my attention and time as well. It's part of my efforts to achieve balance in my life, not, obsess in one area, and live with my ADD. Spiritwoman ^i^
| ||
|
If SFF cared about how many blogs day anyone posts Elaine they would limit them-- blog away and have fun!! Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Funny! Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Hard for me to say. Although my life choices were influenced by sexual stereotypes I never had any difficulty being a woman and getting or doing what I wanted to do. As I look at the younger generation (my grands and nieces) the playing field appears to be pretty even. 2 are in college, one on engineering and the other in pre med on full scholarships and the youngest has received recognition for her academic achievement in science and math. The numbers and frequency of blogs is an often debated topic. Some bloggers feel we should be courteous and give everyone a chance to be seen on the main page while others crank out several a for recognition. You're d©@##ed if you and d@##ed if you don't. Me? I share things, usually no more than one a day because I have many other things needing my attention and time as well. It's part of my efforts to achieve balance in my life, not, obsess in one area, and live with my ADD. You're grandkids seem to be doing great. I remember about your younger granddaughter. Excellent!  Perhaps the younger generation is seeing how important it is to not have a double standard. One could only hope. I have spent too much time blogging, but it's because I love hearing everyone's opinions on many topics. I certainly didn't do so to get attention. I guess I treated it like I do my writing. I get inspired and I write. I get an idea and I blog. It does seem that you're right, damned either way. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
I know one standard not mentioned, lol, men complain, women B!*ch! I worked the last 20 years in what was and still is considered a man's line of work, the last ten in the oil field business. I have found that the majority of men I worked with whined about everything and got their way, if I said something, or complained, I was pretty much told to get over it. Used to tick me off, then one day, I just said Screw it, stopped caring, slowed my pace down to what my male coworkers were doing, decided the company is only going to get what they give. Once I stopped caring, there was no turning back and I have found that is how I am about a lot of things in life. It's none of my business how people choose to live, they want to live in a pigsty, have sex with multiple partners, have kids, don't have kids, etc...., it's their life, their choice.
| ||
|
I know one standard not mentioned, lol, men complain, women B!*ch! I worked the last 20 years in what was and still is considered a man's line of work, the last ten in the oil field business. I have found that the majority of men I worked with whined about everything and got their way, if I said something, or complained, I was pretty much told to get over it. Used to tick me off, then one day, I just said Screw it, stopped caring, slowed my pace down to what my male coworkers were doing, decided the company is only going to get what they give. Once I stopped caring, there was no turning back and I have found that is how I am about a lot of things in life. It's none of my business how people choose to live, they want to live in a pigsty, have sex with multiple partners, have kids, don't have kids, etc...., it's their life, their choice. You're right about the complaining versus bitching. Unfair but true.  I love what you wrote about "slowed my pace down to what my male coworkers were doing".  Good for you, Nileyears. I agree with the "live and let live" approach. I'm that way too. Thanks for your great comment. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Thanks Lucas. I appreciate that. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Elaine it is true about the double standard between men and women and in particular the sexual partner thing. That goes back to the dark ages. Women weren't allowed to do a lot of things way back then. As far as blogging goes you should just do your thing. I enjoy your blogs and will continue to post my comments on them. I enjoy a lot of bloggers here and it isn't singling out anyone in particular.
| ||
|
Elaine it is true about the double standard between men and women and in particular the sexual partner thing. That goes back to the dark ages. Women weren't allowed to do a lot of things way back then. As far as blogging goes you should just do your thing. I enjoy your blogs and will continue to post my comments on them. I enjoy a lot of bloggers here and it isn't singling out anyone in particular. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Thanks for what you wrote, Pat. It's possible that people may have talked behind my back, but I wasn't really affected by double standards either. That said, I know they exist and it isn't fair. Whoever said life is fair, right? I appreciate what you wrote about blogging too. Elaine Shuel
| ||
3/19/2015 11:55 pm |
Hi Elaine: The double standard for men and women was really a big thing when I was growing up especially in certain nationalities, and depending on the culture it still is today. I was surprised to read that you are blocked from replying to someone's blog as you are always so nice to everyone. I'm blocked from even reading one woman's blog as she claims I'm always insulting her, which is total b.s. as everything I've ever written in this group is visible and there's not one single insult to her anywhere.
| ||
|
I know double standards exist in a lot in life in general but I personally have never had any issues about that behaviour important enough to call to mind. As for SFF? Well that's a different story entirely. As I said to you on another comment It all depends on who says what about who in here. I have seen people using very abusive language and name calling to certain members but it's let slide in a lot of cases while others are assailed for making lesser remarks. Keep on blogging Elaine you have a lot of fans here
| ||
|
Hi Elaine: The double standard for men and women was really a big thing when I was growing up especially in certain nationalities, and depending on the culture it still is today. I was surprised to read that you are blocked from replying to someone's blog as you are always so nice to everyone. I'm blocked from even reading one woman's blog as she claims I'm always insulting her, which is total b.s. as everything I've ever written in this group is visible and there's not one single insult to her anywhere. There are definitely double standards in some cultures. Some are based on such archaic ideas that it is shocking that they exist today. As far as being banned, I really wish that people would read that thread where it all started. Unfortunately she deleted them. All I did is agree with something someone said. I now know this person I agreed with, was someone she didn't like, and she took my agreeing with the comment as being against her. It wasn't. I merely agreed with a freedom of speech comment the person made. I apologized if I offended her but it had no bearing. She deleted some of my comments afterwards and then banned me. I noticed she hasn't read any of my blogs since that time. I have no doubt you didn't insult anyone. I have read your comments on my blog and others and you wouldn't be insulting. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Thanks for your comment, Liszt. I agree. Men definitely face some inequality issues. There are many sites where ladies are free and men aren't. I certainly won't complain about that but I'm sure some men do.  Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Thanks for that great comment, Bill. I love what you wrote about teaching your kids to be fair and that you try to be fair. Who could ask for anything more? As far as the amount of posts a day, I never think to myself, I'll post 3 blogs today or 2 or whatever. I get an idea and get excited by it. That's when I put a post up. I have to stop getting excited. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
I could not stand to be in a situation with a 'messy' home. That is the epitome of a miserable life in my world. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
I will say that men can indeed be arrogant...unbelievably arrogant. I haven't encountered too many women I would place in such a category however...a few, but its rare. On balance I think women have a legitimate case when it comes to how hard they work. It took me awhile to fully appreciate it, but looking back now....wow, women are amazing. I still cook 1 thing at a time. The thing I admire the most about women is that they have, and they nurture, their friendships and support network. Men don't do that to the same degree, and we pay a price for that as we live our lives. I have learned so much from the wealth of information people can discover online, from blogs, articles that touch on virtually anything, and the ability to share without the deeper commitment that a face to face relationship requires. But many women find a way to manage these relationships, for years. I admire that. The biggest problem, in my view, that we face today is not the rapidly changing culture. That's the exciting part. The problem today is that we don't see ourselves as in it together. It's a fight for advantage, not a fight for each other. I will say this about double standards...domestic abuse. Women have a support network with respect to this...men do not. This problem in society is vastly misunderstood. Thank you. When it comes to physical abuse, it's true what you wrote regarding men. They don't get the support women do. Men are seen as the ones that attack women, but there are some violent women out there too. It's not as common, of course. Therein lies the problem. It isn't seen as a big issue, since not as many men are in such a dangerous situation. That should change, in that there should be support groups and other forms of help for abused men. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
I know double standards exist in a lot in life in general but I personally have never had any issues about that behaviour important enough to call to mind. As for SFF? Well that's a different story entirely. As I said to you on another comment It all depends on who says what about who in here. I have seen people using very abusive language and name calling to certain members but it's let slide in a lot of cases while others are assailed for making lesser remarks. Keep on blogging Elaine you have a lot of fans here There's something I've wanted to say to you for awhile but again, can't do it privately, so here I go. The first time I ever saw you on this blog, you were defending yourself regarding something that was said. I didn't get involved since I didn't know the circumstances and didn't know you. I want to say that I don't blame you for wanting to defend yourself. I think that's a double standard in itself. Some people attacked you for wanting to defend yourself. I wonder if men would get that same reaction. Now that I know you better, I have no doubt in my mind that you were treated unfairly. You are definitely one of my favorite people on this site and I am truly glad I met you. Elaine Shuel
| ||
|
Elaine thanks for the lovely comment above . I really appreciate it
| ||
|
Elaine thanks for the lovely comment above . I really appreciate it Have a great weekend!!!!Elaine Shuel
| ||
3/21/2015 9:00 pm |
The double standard cuts in both directions.
| ||
|
Yes it does, Rentier1. There are certain things men are treated unfairly about and the same for women. Thanks for your comment. Elaine Shuel
|
×
×