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Skariff2 67M
4317 posts
9/21/2019 10:27 am
Observation


What Learn During Dinner
CHRISTINE CARTER | MARCH , 2008

So many social skills are learned at the dinner table I hardly know where to begin. The research is really compelling around language development and dinnertime – and language is the most important facet of social intelligence we have.

A team at the Harvard Ed School wanted to know where learned the rare words they had found were particularly good markers of literacy. Of the 2,000 words they were looking for, only 3 of them came from parents reading to their . More than 1,000 were learned at the dinner table. This is why dinner loses its power when we isolate meals from adult meals. My 7-year-old isn't going to be able to teach my 5—year—old all those rare words (though I'm sure she could teach her about 250 euphemisms for, oh, just about any bathroom word). I can only imagine how much worse it will be once they are teenagers.

Manners are a more important social skill than we sometimes think. As a sociologist, I believe certain social norms teach about the emotions make up a happy life. When I say, "Molly, don't interrupt your ," I am teaching her about reciprocity and empathy. When they watch offer a guest the best cut of meat, they learn generosity. Simple acts of gratitude, like saying thank you to someone for passing the salt, are happiness building blocks.

Social skills, including language, are just – they are skills are built over time, better learned example than explicit instruction. develop any skill better if they learn it in a routine situation feels safe, and the dinner table might just be the best place to teach and learn certain skills. The good news is there needn't be loads of adults around—single parent families who have regular dinnertime routines reap the same . If you have trouble getting food on the table, check out Leslie Kaufman's plan—and the next video for added incentive.

Christine Carter, Ph.D., is a of two and the executive director of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. Find more tips for raising happy at greatergoodparents.org.

Based on the undeniable research, it stands to reason the end result, in this case an adult human being, is, in great part, a product of his/her upbringing. So, while the right wing rails against my assertions, the truth is they are a product of their parental guidance. Therefore, the inability to critically think, the inability to rationally substantiate their opinions, their immediate resort to name calling and violence are all products of their developmental skills passed on to them their parents. Therefore, while they may very well love their parents, the education to which they were exposed fails to meet the basic standards of civility and it's those beliefs they fight so fervently to preserve.

When I point this out to them, the education in name calling and violence leaps to the fore and all erroneous parental guidance takes control in their struggling effort to stay afloat in a world which operates contrary to their beliefs. So, I stand my statements and put forth the tenor of their posts as evidence. You see, carrying on a cogent discussion of the issues is impossible for these folks in large part because of their upbringing.

Prejudice cannot be conquered with logic, logic didn't instill it and logic cannot eradicate it.


Skariff2 67M
2926 posts
9/21/2019 10:28 am

...

Prejudice cannot be conquered with logic, logic didn't instill it and logic cannot eradicate it.


bigblock46 73M
9816 posts
9/21/2019 10:53 am

Your attack on mine and Hanks parents crosses every line of decency. But that’s where you reside in the current era.


Katie_au_lait 73F
6748 posts
9/21/2019 10:59 am

My thoughts exactly; Skariff... that's how I was brought up and how my children were too.


Skariff2 67M
2926 posts
9/21/2019 11:38 am

    Quoting bigblock46:
    Your attack on mine and Hanks parents crosses every line of decency. But that’s where you reside in the current era.
Research strongly indicates my conclusions are accurate. You can rail against this as you wish, but the facts are undeniable. If pointing out these facts seems to you and your alter-ego seem to be indecent, perhaps you should re-evaluate your existence. When you're faced with insurmountable odds reasoning flies out the window and the developmental bases of your life come to the fore. I have tried, unsuccessfully, for quite some time to get you to actually think about your position. It was YOU who drifted away from the discussion at hand and began with the name calling and when the name calling began to fail you turned to violence. These are not traits learned in History 101, these are traits learned at the dinner table. I regret to inform you you are now permanently labeled with this malady and your continuing posts do nothing more than prove it. I will not hesitate reminding of this when the situation calls for it.

Good luck on your journey.

Prejudice cannot be conquered with logic, logic didn't instill it and logic cannot eradicate it.


bigblock46 73M
9816 posts
9/21/2019 3:17 pm

    Quoting Skariff2:
    Research strongly indicates my conclusions are accurate. You can rail against this as you wish, but the facts are undeniable. If pointing out these facts seems to you and your alter-ego seem to be indecent, perhaps you should re-evaluate your existence. When you're faced with insurmountable odds reasoning flies out the window and the developmental bases of your life come to the fore. I have tried, unsuccessfully, for quite some time to get you to actually think about your position. It was YOU who drifted away from the discussion at hand and began with the name calling and when the name calling began to fail you turned to violence. These are not traits learned in History 101, these are traits learned at the dinner table. I regret to inform you you are now permanently labeled with this malady and your continuing posts do nothing more than prove it. I will not hesitate reminding of this when the situation calls for it.

    Good luck on your journey.
"I have no explanation for this ignorance other than the hatred you carry for anyone who thinks, acts or believes differently than you or the very poor job your parents did in teaching you the art of actually thinking rather than having your beliefs poured into your head by other people unable to rationally cogitate on issues."

The above was from your first response, As you see Sir you struck the first blow.


Skariff2 67M
2926 posts
9/21/2019 3:31 pm

    Quoting bigblock46:
    "I have no explanation for this ignorance other than the hatred you carry for anyone who thinks, acts or believes differently than you or the very poor job your parents did in teaching you the art of actually thinking rather than having your beliefs poured into your head by other people unable to rationally cogitate on issues."

    The above was from your first response, As you see Sir you struck the first blow.
Of all that's happened this is the important factor you've chosen the hang your hat upon? Good grief............go back to the very beginning instead of picking the one line which you believe exonerates you from the issues I've raised........you never cease to fulfill my expectations and predictions.

Prejudice cannot be conquered with logic, logic didn't instill it and logic cannot eradicate it.


bigblock46 73M
9816 posts
9/21/2019 6:25 pm

    Quoting Skariff2:
    Of all that's happened this is the important factor you've chosen the hang your hat upon? Good grief............go back to the very beginning instead of picking the one line which you believe exonerates you from the issues I've raised........you never cease to fulfill my expectations and predictions.
its quite simple SIR, we were taught manners at the kitchen table. Don't talk with your mouth full, chew with your mouth shut, don't take more than you can eat, don't downgrade others, don't spread rumors, above all others show some respect for folks you don't know. Treat others as you want to be treated. Had I ever questioned how so and so was letting their kids do this or that., my Mother would have tanned my hide after she informed me that she was raising me not so and so kids. I learned at a early age that denigration was not acceptable behavior in our house, most of time it was taught with a elm switch. Maybe you should have gotten a few of those educational meeting with the elm switch you wouldn't be so mouthy.


sparkleflit 72F
5224 posts
9/21/2019 7:01 pm

    Quoting bigblock46:
    its quite simple SIR, we were taught manners at the kitchen table. Don't talk with your mouth full, chew with your mouth shut, don't take more than you can eat, don't downgrade others, don't spread rumors, above all others show some respect for folks you don't know. Treat others as you want to be treated. Had I ever questioned how so and so was letting their kids do this or that., my Mother would have tanned my hide after she informed me that she was raising me not so and so kids. I learned at a early age that denigration was not acceptable behavior in our house, most of time it was taught with a elm switch. Maybe you should have gotten a few of those educational meeting with the elm switch you wouldn't be so mouthy.
You say your parents taught you not to spread rumors?.....Well, you didn't learn that lesson, did you? LOL.........You do little else but spread rumors on this site........


starwomyn 66F
6757 posts
9/22/2019 12:07 am

    Quoting bigblock46:
    Your attack on mine and Hanks parents crosses every line of decency. But that’s where you reside in the current era.
The Leaf aka Skariff2 does seem to have a severe case of Big Block/Hank/Trump/Ad Infinitum Derangement Syndrome

Help me to master my resentments by understanding that the people who wrong me were perhaps spiritually sick. Please help me show those I resent the same Tolerance, Pity and Patience that I would cheerfully grant a sick friend.** Help me to see that this is a sick person ….

Frequently easier said than done.


CarolinaPanthera 58F
3410 posts
9/22/2019 5:21 am

    Quoting bigblock46:
    "I have no explanation for this ignorance other than the hatred you carry for anyone who thinks, acts or believes differently than you or the very poor job your parents did in teaching you the art of actually thinking rather than having your beliefs poured into your head by other people unable to rationally cogitate on issues."

    The above was from your first response, As you see Sir you struck the first blow.
So, according to you, you just "crossed every line of decency."

Quote: "the very poor job your parents did in teaching you the art of actually thinking rather than having your beliefs poured into your head by other people unable to rationally cogitate on issues."

How terribly sad to be such a raging hypocrite.


bigblock46 73M
9816 posts
9/22/2019 6:04 pm

    Quoting CarolinaPanthera:
    So, according to you, you just "crossed every line of decency."

    Quote: "the very poor job your parents did in teaching you the art of actually thinking rather than having your beliefs poured into your head by other people unable to rationally cogitate on issues."

    How terribly sad to be such a raging hypocrite.


Dang you just called Skariff a "raging hypocrite."


CarolinaPanthera 58F
3410 posts
9/22/2019 6:31 pm

    Quoting bigblock46:
    Dang you just called Skariff a "raging hypocrite."
Nice try, but actually, no I didn't.. You're the raging hypocrite. If you weren't sadly uneducated, you would've realized that. Oh well. What ya gonna do?


earthytaurus3 79F
40287 posts
9/22/2019 7:06 pm

We are, indeed, - by a large part - the product of our environment. No question about it.


earthytaurus3 79F
40287 posts
9/22/2019 7:39 pm

Then again, there's always the nature/nurture debate.


LeafReport 68M
2474 posts
9/23/2019 2:44 am

    Quoting bigblock46:
    its quite simple SIR, we were taught manners at the kitchen table. Don't talk with your mouth full, chew with your mouth shut, don't take more than you can eat, don't downgrade others, don't spread rumors, above all others show some respect for folks you don't know. Treat others as you want to be treated. Had I ever questioned how so and so was letting their kids do this or that., my Mother would have tanned my hide after she informed me that she was raising me not so and so kids. I learned at a early age that denigration was not acceptable behavior in our house, most of time it was taught with a elm switch. Maybe you should have gotten a few of those educational meeting with the elm switch you wouldn't be so mouthy.
Wait a minute Stinky. You have been provided ample opportunity to apologize for abhorrent behavior here in the blogs and disrespectful and offensive racist inspired comments. You have even been publicly forgiven without condition to assist in cleansing your reputation so that you may reenter the community of civility and yet you refuse to accept the grace.


earthytaurus3 79F
40287 posts
9/23/2019 8:18 am

    Quoting LeafReport:
    Wait a minute Stinky. You have been provided ample opportunity to apologize for abhorrent behavior here in the blogs and disrespectful and offensive racist inspired comments. You have even been publicly forgiven without condition to assist in cleansing your reputation so that you may reenter the community of civility and yet you refuse to accept the grace.
He seems, instead, to promote physical abuse where one resorts to beating another into submission. That's street thug mentality, isn't it? It clarifies why he and Hank see eye to eye, doesn't it? Hank, as a prison guard, served in a position where he could intimidate the helpless and caged to achieve a sense of power … no rational reasoning required to wallow in authority.


earthytaurus3 79F
40287 posts
9/23/2019 8:57 am

Throughout his comments here, BigBlock best likes his use of the word 'hatred' in attempt to prove a vacant point. It's clear to me he's projecting. Why is that not clear to his like-minded supporters??? Block is NOT a conservative of old' he's an outright, off-the-charts, radical. I have no clue of the world he seeks, do YOU?