| Blogs > spiritwoman45 > Life in the Canyon |
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Is Unavailability Appealing? We read frequently from fellow bloggers who need and have problems finding work, are suffering from age discrimination or experiencing other work related issues. My situation is completely the opposite. As most know I left the day job part of life almost 10 years ago and did not work full time for the 5 years prior to that. Even so I worked a bit longer than planned. For years I figured that I would make my exit from the demands and control of the work place ASAP and would just live simply on less. Conformity and political correctness were so stressful. Having to be someone who was not what I really was psychologically demanding. I had to hide my true self until I was in a “safe” place. Like many I had all of these fantasies about being retired. That lasted for a year or so then I got involved with my art and spiritual practices and began working in these areas in a self-employed / at will status. Next the residence facility project literally knocked on my door providing a solution to what to do with a house I no longer needed or wanted during a time when the economy had tanked and taken most of my equity with it. The last 2 years I actually came out with a profit especially when the tax benefits are factored in. None of this was planned or expected but good old hyperactivity and creativity will not let me stop. I am also so blessed to be as healthy, physically fit and clear minded as I was in my 40’s. This is indeed a huge gift, primarily due to good genetics. Well – maybe some healthy living in terms of diet and exercise but lots of risk taking and declining many “preventative” health procedures and recommendations. Now for the weird part. While others have difficulty finding much needed employment I get regular offers without looking. When I really needed work I always had it but I had to search out and aggressively compete for the good jobs. Now that I neither want nor need this it appears on my door step. Someone mentioned fairness in a blog a few days ago. Is this fair in any sense of the word? Should not the opportunities be there for those who need them when they need them? But as we all know life is not fair. From time to time I actually consider some of the job opportunities but then remember that I would not like or want the imposed structure and that I would be taking a job from someone who really needs it. I have spent considerable time considering why the job offers come my way now at a time in life when most are not even considered for “real” jobs. I live outside of the social “rules” and flaunt it. I call it as I see it rather than biting my tongue for fear that I might offend my bosses or called to task for being politically incorrect. I declared every day Halloween and I dress as I please when and where I please. This behavior would have gotten me fired during my day job days. I’m thinking maybe it’s the human trait of wanting what you can’t have. I’m not any better or have any more to offer anyone than I ever did but I am successful and unavailable. Is this what creates desirability? If so it certainly speaks to how shallow our value system is. Spiritwoman ^i^ |
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7/12/2013 6:38 pm |
You gave me an idea. I think I will think through a list of people I know in the field who I feel would be a good match and recommend them. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/12/2013 6:39 pm |
Good point but they way underestimate how much of a PIA my getting things done might be if they and I should disagree over anything important. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/12/2013 9:08 pm |
My issue is that I always knew I wasn't normal but had to "role play" it back in the professional days. Another thought is that perhaps mainstream has become a little more tolerant - although you's never know it from some of the stuff on here. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/12/2013 9:11 pm |
You're right about the army not asking you back unless you are a young guy who left after a short term. Then they keep you in active reserves for a couple of years and another level after that. If they run short they do call these people back. Almost happened to my son-in-law. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/12/2013 9:12 pm |
Almost like saying "I told you so" Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/12/2013 11:08 pm |
The new work force does not have the work ethics they used to have. It is harder to train them and when you finally get them trained they miss work all the time. I think that is the reason you are in such demand. People know you, or your reputation and miss you. Spiritwoman ^i^
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I have long had a theory of life that I refer to as "The Need Theory." The more you feel (believe) you need from life, the world or people, the less you will receive from any or either of them. In fact, people, the world, and life in general is/are UNABLE to really give it to you! Only in modest amounts and only temporarily. Want something out of life? Stop thinking you need it. It will come to you (That is, if it's in your fate, or God's plan, whichever way you prefer to think of it.) This is true for anything. GBU, Gavin
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7/13/2013 7:58 am |
You're right about the army not asking you back unless you are a young guy who left after a short term. Then they keep you in active reserves for a couple of years and another level after that. If they run short they do call these people back. Almost happened to my son-in-law. What was interesting about these guys is that both were collecting social security. I assume they must have been former officers in the US forces who never went to the trouble to resign their commissions. I often wonder how they made out. I am in the same position, in theory. I still hold a Queen's Commission, and suspect all it would take is a federal Order-in-Council to put me back in uniform.
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7/13/2013 7:59 am |
Hi Spirit: I thought this blog was going to be about whether we are attracted to unavailable men who are married. lol I had a hard time getting a new job after I turned forty. I did get one but it wasn't easy as there were lots of young women applying for that job. Even though they didn't have the experience I had, I think the only reason I got the job at all was because the interviewer was an older woman. When I started work, most of the women on staff looked like young fashion models, but their work habits and skills were so bad. They were always socializing, making private phone calls, and taking sick days, yet they didn't get fired. Seems that many big firms care more about youth and appearance than anything else.
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7/13/2013 9:29 am |
I have long had a theory of life that I refer to as "The Need Theory." The more you feel (believe) you need from life, the world or people, the less you will receive from any or either of them. In fact, people, the world, and life in general is/are UNABLE to really give it to you! Only in modest amounts and only temporarily. Want something out of life? Stop thinking you need it. It will come to you (That is, if it's in your fate, or God's plan, whichever way you prefer to think of it.) This is true for anything. GBU, Gavin Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/13/2013 9:30 am |
Bad Kid in me. More of then than not people see what they want to see and overlook the negatives in any situation Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/13/2013 9:32 am |
The right place at the right time is a big part of how end up with beneficial things and I suspect being in the wrong place at the wrong time can account for many of the negatives too. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/13/2013 9:35 am |
I saw an item a few years ago on one of the prime time US news programs about two psychiatrists who had been pulled back into active service, and were going through a basic training refresher before being sent off to Iraq. What was interesting about these guys is that both were collecting social security. I assume they must have been former officers in the US forces who never went to the trouble to resign their commissions. I often wonder how they made out. I am in the same position, in theory. I still hold a Queen's Commission, and suspect all it would take is a federal Order-in-Council to put me back in uniform. Spiritwoman ^i^
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7/13/2013 10:04 am |
Hi Spirit: I thought this blog was going to be about whether we are attracted to unavailable men who are married. lol I had a hard time getting a new job after I turned forty. I did get one but it wasn't easy as there were lots of young women applying for that job. Even though they didn't have the experience I had, I think the only reason I got the job at all was because the interviewer was an older woman. When I started work, most of the women on staff looked like young fashion models, but their work habits and skills were so bad. They were always socializing, making private phone calls, and taking sick days, yet they didn't get fired. Seems that many big firms care more about youth and appearance than anything else. . Spiritwoman ^i^
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You and a very dear friend are in similar circumstances. If you have it in you, seekers will never stop - as a saying goes : If you have it, you flaunt it If you have it and you flaunt it, you are chased .... oops .... sought after.  Have a wonderful Sunday and the week ahead, SpiritGirl.  "To fight the darkness do not draw your sword, light a candle" - Zarathustra
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7/14/2013 8:53 am |
You and a very dear friend are in similar circumstances. If you have it in you, seekers will never stop - as a saying goes : If you have it, you flaunt it If you have it and you flaunt it, you are chased .... oops .... sought after. Have a wonderful Sunday and the week ahead, SpiritGirl. Spiritwoman ^i^
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