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True Reasons For Divorce? I read in the papers today that a growing number of Japanese women have begun suing their husbands for divorce once the men retire. It was written that the aim of the women is to bring an end to longstanding marital problems caused by the indifference of their husbands as well as their incompetence in the home. It was further reported that interviews with Japanese women revealed that everything boiled down to the desire of wives to hear their husbands say the "three magic phrases" more often: "Thank you", "Sorry" and "I love you". I wonder if this is true and also, why women would want to wait until the men retire to file for divorce - after so many years together, learning to survive and overcome so many problems? Lee Live today as if it is your last For tomorrow will soon be in the past |
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11/20/2007 3:03 am |
I think it all boils down to social norms. from what I heard japanese women still wait for their husbands to come home no matter how late before even thinking of eating dinner...and then eat only after he has eaten. anyway I guess that's for the older generation. the new generation japanese are more modern than the societies (europe or the states) which they mimick in clothes and in behaviour. lucky for them they have divorce. the philippines still doesnt have divorce, only legal separation or a church annulment (take your pick) both of which are very expensive and hard to acquire. as for saying those 3 phrases...well macho societies dont look kindly on men who express their love so submissively I suppose and they prefer to simply let the women do their "obligation" as a wife. the divorce is I imagine to help them in their old years as these women have devoted most of their lives to keeping home and hubby happy and neglected their own (financial) future. just my opinion.    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary by-pass. After such a monumental assault on the heart, it takes years to amend all the habits and attitudes that led up to it. ~Mary Kay Blakely
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11/20/2007 8:50 am |
...A lady told me once that she is dreading the time when her husband retires. Curious I asked why?....She replied because i will get twice the husband and only half the money. .....All I want is some Lobstahhhhh............ "The cause of America is in a great measure the cause of all mankind."....T. Paine
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Thank you ladies for all your comments. Generally, all of you agree 1)that the "three magic phrases" are very important 2)the divorce at the men's retirement is because they cannot bear to have the men at home with them day and night. (All men please take note of the above). And I am a retiree! I must be very lucky my wife did not divorced me. Must be because I know to say the "three magic phrases".  shay, Firstly, I have to say I am not looking. Secondly, a lot of us knows how to appreciate our wives and do not make them feel like they are servants. Maynilabelle, I agree with your views except one. How does the divorce help these women financially? These men are pensioners. Hi summer, All that I can say is some wives are well compensated with more than "three magic phrases". Hi earthytaurus, Sad isn't it that after 36 years together it may end like that. Where has the love gone to? Hi flakes, Sorry but have to argue with you a little bit. 1)They may not have children. Even if they have working children, depending on the children may not be a good idea. The children, being young, may not earn much. 2)With the children grown and away from home, many of us look forward to be a couple again. Furthermore, we can now indulge ourselves a little instead of saving and scrimping for the children. Hi belle, And peace can only be found away from the husband? Hi imatallone, Yes, living together needs a lot of tolerance and adjustments. Wonder why they got married in the first place. Ladies, my curiosity is because in my country, when a pensioner passes away, his or her spouse will receive the pension for the rest of his/her life. However, if they are divorced, the spouse loses this entitlement. So, divorce at retirement, is not financially sound. I wonder how it is in your country? Lee Live today as if it is your last For tomorrow will soon be in the past
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11/20/2007 3:49 pm |
hi Lee in reply to your comment: "I agree with your views except one. How does the divorce help these women financially? These men are pensioners." A: I really have no idea. isnt the idea of divorce to divide property and income? in their case, pension? as I mentioned, we have no divorce in the philippines. perhaps simply the idea of having done their duty to family and hubby they are now given a choice to live alone and choose divorce. ps I would enjoy having my future hubby home instead of gallivanting around town, so in my case when my potential husband (I'm a widow) retires, we'll have loads of fun travelling and enjoying the rest of our lives at leisure....or so I imagine! 
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hi Lee in reply to your comment: "I agree with your views except one. How does the divorce help these women financially? These men are pensioners." A: I really have no idea. isnt the idea of divorce to divide property and income? in their case, pension? as I mentioned, we have no divorce in the philippines. perhaps simply the idea of having done their duty to family and hubby they are now given a choice to live alone and choose divorce. ps I would enjoy having my future hubby home instead of gallivanting around town, so in my case when my potential husband (I'm a widow) retires, we'll have loads of fun travelling and enjoying the rest of our lives at leisure....or so I imagine! Yes I suppose they can divide the property and claim alimony but would they lose out in the end if the spouse died? The same article says that in Japan, they are going to pass a new law to pay part of the man's pension to the wife. As such, the women would still get part of the pension even if they were to divorce. However, what happens when the husband marries again? Who gets the pension? Me thinks you have got the right idea and happy traveling and enjoyment with your future husband! Live today as if it is your last For tomorrow will soon be in the past
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Yeah, I agree with you and I think it's because they were financially dependent on the husband. Lee Live today as if it is your last For tomorrow will soon be in the past
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