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PHIL MICKELSON: HERO OR WUSS?
Posted:Jun 23, 2017 11:26 am
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2017 12:04 pm
29 Views
Trigger warning: This blog is about a golfer. I know how much women loathe golf -- Maisie reacts very badly when I watch the conclusion of a golf tournament. I only do this 5-6 times a year, and she watches Monk and Big Bang Theory around the clock, 24/7. I am an abused saint. I see I am already off topic.

Phil Mickelson is a great golfer, talented and resourceful. Experts agree that his talent matches that of Tiger Woods, though he perhaps lacks the killer instinct and supreme focus of Woods. It is often said that if Woods had not blazed onto the scene in 1997, we would think of the last 20 years as the Age of Mickelson. Phil hits the ball very far, takes chances, has an exquisite short game and is always impeccably sportsmanlike. When Phil is in the field, I am usually pulling for him.

That said: Phil seems to have bought into the notion that he must ostentatiously withdraw from tournaments to be "supportive" of family events of a rather routine nature. Phil has won 5 major championships (the most among active players, except Woods, who is not really active these days). But Phil lacks the U.S. Open, perhaps the most important of them all, and without it he will not have the "Career Slam" on his resume. He has been runner-up in the Open a record-setting 6 times.

Phil is 47 now, and realistically has only a few more shots at the Open title. This year he withdrew at the last minute so that he might attend his daughter Amanda's high school graduation. Well, OK, but....in 2013 Phil had to jet mid-tournament to California to attend Amanda's 8th grade graduation. Phil got back to Philadelphia at 4 a.m. and met a 7:00 am tee time. He finished runner-up. And in 1999, when Mickelson's wife was pregnant with Amanda, Phil very ostentatiously announced he was carrying a beeper and would leave mid-round even if he were leading. Phil got through the tournament, finishing runner-up.

There are 2 ways of looking at this, and I am curious as to what others think. The two options are:

1) Phil is noble and qualifies for the highest encomiums we can summon up. Father of the Year. In perpetuity.

2) Phil is a champion golfer and he owes it to himself and to his family to be the best he can be. The graduation ceremony can be (will be) videoed, probably even streamed live to Phil's phone. Perhaps mom and daughter should have intervened, along these lines: Amanda, "Dad, I truly hope you will play the Open. It is the best graduation gift you can give me." Amy (wife): "She's right, Phil. Come back with your shield or on it."

So what do you think
?



BELOW: Phil at the conclusion of his swing.
6 Comments
TWO VIEWS OF OLD AGE
Posted:Jun 22, 2017 8:39 pm
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2017 6:30 am
72 Views
The Old Man's Comforts and How He Gained Them (1799)
by Robert Southey


"You are old, father William," the young man cried,
"The few locks which are left you are grey;
You are hale, father William, a hearty old man;
Now tell me the reason, I pray."
"In the days of my youth," father William replied,
"I remember'd that youth would fly fast,
And abus'd not my health and my vigour at first,
That I never might need them at last."

"You are old, father William," the young man cried,
"And pleasures with youth pass away.
And yet you lament not the days that are gone;
Now tell me the reason, I pray."
"In the days of my youth," father William replied,
"I remember'd that youth could not last;
I thought of the future, whatever I did,
That I never might grieve for the past."

"You are old, father William," the young man cried,
"And life must be hast'ning away;
You are cheerful and love to converse upon death;
Now tell me the reason, I pray."
"I am cheerful, young man," father William replied,
"Let the cause thy attention engage;
In the days of my youth I remember'd my God!
And He hath not forgotten my age."

‘You are old, Father William’ (1865)
Lewis Carroll


“You are old, Father William,” the young man said,
“And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head –
Do you think, at your age, it is right?”
“In my youth,” Father William replied to his son,
“I feared it might injure the brain;
But, now that I’m perfectly sure I have none,
Why, I do it again and again.”

“You are old,” said the youth, “as I mentioned before,
And have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door –
Pray, what is the reason of that?”
“In my youth,” said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,
“I kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment – one shilling the box –
Allow me to sell you a couple?”

“You are old,” said the youth, “and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak –
Pray, how did you manage to do it?”
“In my youth,” said his father, “I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,
Has lasted the rest of my life.”

“You are old,” said the youth, “one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose –
What made you so awfully clever?”
“I have answered three questions, and that is enough,”
Said his father; “don’t give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I’ll kick you downstairs!”

5 Comments
"LAUGHING MY #OSSOFF"
Posted:Jun 21, 2017 11:31 pm
Last Updated:Jun 23, 2017 8:20 am
288 Views
I thought the best tweet on the night of the election was this three-word gem by Kellyanne Conway: "Laughing my #Ossoff." Republicans were in a mood to crow today after being bashed relentlessly in DC and in the media for months. Meanwhile Democrats are licking their wounds and saying amongst themselves "what can you expect from a bunch of Georgia crackers? They couldn't find Russia on the map!"

In fact, it seems to me that the election says far more about the Democrats than it does about the Republicans. Once again all their calculations were wrong. Among them:

1) The Dems insisted that the special election in Georgia District 6 was a (tympani roll, please) NATIONAL REFERENDUM! So convinced were they that the voters would deliver Trump a stinging rebuke that they failed to take into account that they were also setting the table for a national referendum on themselves. And they lost. They insisted that Karen Handel was a Trump proxy. When she prevailed, Trump won a national referendum created solely by the opposition.

2) The Dems may have forgotten Tip O'Neill's axiom: all politics is local. To national Democrats, Jon Ossoff was young Lochinvar come out of the west, tall, slender, possessing a gaudy educational résumé (Georgetown and London School of Economics, similar to Bill Clinton's) and the sort of preppy good looks which young people could relate to and which liberal dowagers could fawn over. Karen Handel was by contrast a little charisma-challenged, and had no college degree. Trump had won the district by a mere 1.5%. Victory seemed certain.

But as we know, Handel won by almost 4% -- Trump was not only not rebuked, he seemed to be picking up steam. It seems that the voters in the 6th district sized it up a bit differently from how the national Demos foresaw. The district is certainly in play for Democrats these days -- Atlanta has long since more or less seceded from the rest of Georgia and is a haven for millennials, gays, and trendies. But this was not in Atlanta proper and is the sort of affluent exurb that once was guaranteed GOP. They doubtless took note of the fact that Ossoff's huge war chest was mostly from out of state, including millions from California alone. Perhaps the voters there felt like Sherman was coming back, marchin' through Georgia. This time Sherman got his ass whipped.

Doubtless they also noticed the fact that he did not live in their district. He could not vote for himself. The reason? He was SHACKED UP with his girlfriend in another district so she could be closer to Emory. Yes, we still use terms like "shacked up" down here. Now I do not rebuke any young man for "shacking up," but when you're running office, it complicates things. Surely there are shacks in the Sixth District.

And perhaps they also noted that he had padded his résumé liberally and that he really had no particular set of policies he espoused except for Dem boilerplate.

I know this district a bit personally -- I have a first cousin who lives in Alpharetta and has prospered and I played golf with him a few times at his rich guy golf course.. I also was a regular visitor for a while to Atlanta because a friend of mine was the librarian at the Paideia School, the liberal rich kid prep school in Atlanta where the young Ossoff prepped. All the rich lefties sent their kids there to be educated. I don't think many peanut farmers in Plains sent their kids here though the Jewish intelligentsia of Atlanta (like Ossoff) were well represented. Ossoff is a GINO -- Georgian in name only. The librarian, a Wellesley graduate and Hillary fan, and I incidentally were the match made in hell, and in any event the 165 miles between us precluded a true SHACK JOB. I seem to be obsessing on this term.

3) The Dems need to do something about their extreme obnoxiousness. Let's call this the Leaf factor. I don't want to swell the head of our resident infantile twerp, but I have a strong suspicion there are many Leafs (Leaves?) in the country -- every coffee shop, fern bar, gay bar, and tofu joint in the land has a stunningly obnoxious liberal telling them they are stupid and not deserving of a job, a family, or respect. Likewise there are equivalents of our SFF Witches of Eastwick, the impossibly embittered quartet of women from 3 nations who gnaw at the flesh of conservatives. They are always the loudest, shrillest, and most arrogant voices in a discussion. The network news staffs are loaded with more polished versions of Leaf, and late night talk show hosts have become insufferable.

4) All of this could be encapsulated in the word hubris.... defined as foolish pride, arrogance enough to challenge the gods. But in ancient Greece, hubris led men to meet their nemesis, the inescapable agent of the hubristic man's downfall. It seems like Trump is shaping up as the Democratic nemesis.


BELOW: Marchin' through Georgia.
42 Comments
TROLLIN' BY THE RIVER (or is it a firth?)
Posted:Jun 20, 2017 9:26 am
Last Updated:Jun 22, 2017 10:05 am
179 Views

I have been trolled and flamed a few times here but usually based on something I have said. Katie_au_lait has taken trollery to a new height by denouncing me for what I did not say. Katie, surely you don't think I care about rock festivals in Great Britain or anywhere on God's (sorry) earth. To me, a rock concert is a potential traffic jam on the interstate, or a dearth of parking downtown. I only pointed out that impresarios in the music world cannot afford to be political because their job is to put butts in the seats.

Of course I follow the terrorist incidents in Britain, including the one targeting Muslims, and I watched the towering inferno streaming live from my computer in the wee hours. I had nothing really to add to the conversation, though I could have clapped myself on the back about how compassionate I felt. In the case of the Grenfell Towers, I have read a bit about the bureaucratic errors which may have led to the catastrophe. The fiery tower was especially horrifying -- Americans could not watch it without thinking of the World Trade Center. It seems there is enough blame to be shared around but the city authorities of London have to bear the greatest responsibility. I just don't think it is proper for me to meddle and criticize. That's your job.

The London police force does a marvelous job, as do British police generally. With 20,000 people on the terror watch list, their job is very difficult. I will leave it at that.
8 Comments
"BLINDED BY TURDS"
Posted:Jun 19, 2017 11:57 am
Last Updated:Jun 20, 2017 9:05 am
250 Views

Since the themes of the day seem to be vernacular music, scatology, and the way some of our bloggers re-package their excreta as blogs, my mind's ear harked back to a tune recorded by Oscar Brand with the elegant title "Blinded by Turds." The name Oscar Brand may not ring a bell, but he was an indefatigable collector of folksongs and a longtime radio show host in NYC. (By birth he was a Canadian Jew.) The rollicking 6/8 folksong probably has Irish roots, but in the American version the luckless hero of the song is a "cowpoke."

The cowpoke's sad fate is that he is the accidental victim of a lady who has taken too many laxatives to aid her digestion. As Brand sings it:

"She ran to the window, stuck out her ass
Just at that moment a cowhand did pass
He heard the strange noise, so he gazed up on high
A mighty big turd hit him right in the eye."


Followed by the refrain:

"Toorala, tooralay
A rolling stone gathers no moss, so they say
Sing along, with the birds
It's a wonderful song but it's all about turds."


The tragedy deepens:

"Oh he ran to the east and the west
When a further consignment arrived on his chest
He fled to the north and he fled to the south
When a bloody big turd hit him right in the mouth."
REFRAIN

And his sad ultimate fate:

The next time you walk over Flatriver Bridge
Look out for a cowhand asleep on the ridge
His chest bears a placard, whereon are these words:
'Be kind to a cowboy who's blinded by turds.'"
REFRAIN

As I pondered this sad ballad, I began to see it as an allegory for this blogsite on many days. We the readers are collectively the poor cowpoke, and the blogger from Southeast Virginia is the wretched lady seeking to unstop her trapped excreta. In the last couple of days this blogger has put on a clinic -- in a succession of blog-turds, he has presumed to lecture fathers, gun owners, Trump voters, and indeed anyone who does not embrace his own standard of enlightenment.

My dad was a walking fund of slang from the WW2 era, and he would sometimes cryptically remark "I got hit by a BLIVET today," and we were forced to guess by context just what a BLIVET was. Finally when I had reached my majority, I said, "OK dad, what exactly is a BLIVET?" His response: "10 pounds of sh*t in a 5 pound bag."

It might not be unfair to describe Leaf as a renewable BLIVET.


23 Comments
A WORLD GONE MAD
Posted:Jun 17, 2017 10:28 am
Last Updated:Jun 19, 2017 8:09 pm
383 Views
There is an ugly specter haunting the United States -- the specter of civil disunion and anarchy. (Yes, I am borrowing the rhetoric of Karl Marx.) It is frightening. Even in 1860, when the nation was on the brink of a tragic and bloody war, we were held together by deep commonalities of language, culture, religion, and codes of behavior. The nation, North and South, remained committed to the notion of America as the "city on a hill" (as John Winthrop, invoking the Sermon on the Mount, preached in the 17th century), and a beacon to the rest of the world. As Lincoln noted in his poetic second inaugural address: "Both [sides in the conflict] read the same Bible, and pray to the same God." We can no longer say this.

I sense this unity of national purpose is on the brink of disappearing. Such an event would have global implications as well, since we have been the linchpin of the western alliance for 75 years. We can't very well lead if we are two nations, or worse, many demographic tribes. And we have to go it alone -- our allies have no leader of consequence except for Angela Merkel, and she has committed to a reckless path which may in time rot old Europe from within. And none of them, including Merkel, can rise above the level of nattering about Trump's lack of polish. The foppish Macron boasts about the power of his handshake. The United Kingdom has no clear leader presently.

What has happened to us? I think the first step is to acknowledge that both of the two "sides" in our internal war have contributed to the present impasse. Let me concede first that the Republican primary spread over 2015-6 unleashed some demons. To my astonishment at the time, the GOP fell big for the crack cocaine candidate -- Donald Trump. Trump said the things which caused instant and brief euphoria among resentful conservatives and "deplorables" --- things like "we will build a great wall" and "I will bomb the hell out of ISIS." His verbal incontinence and lack of discipline (which I think is his most unfortunate characteristic) were on display from the beginning. We can't say we were sold a bill of goods -- we knowingly selected the hyperbolic salesman rather than one of a bumper crop of good conventional candidates. I think in retrospect Trump was the only candidate who could have beaten Hillary and who has the force of will and nerve to attempt the draining of the swamp.

Since the nomination, and more especially since the election, the Democrats and progressives generally have behaved in a way which is historically repugnant and without precedent. Let me state that again: since the election the Left has acted despicably. The day after the election, college girls and society matrons (looking like they were attending a costume party) marched ludicrously down our streets in what was obviously an anti-Trump demonstration. The Inauguration itself was threatened by leftist violence. When Trump announced a temporary travel ban, Soros-funded mobs were en route to our airports within minutes. Congress has become a mockery of its former self as Democrats openly work in unison to thwart any and all Trump initiatives -- they have no other agenda.. Threats of violence and actual violence are every-day occurrences, climaxing in the Ballpark Shootout, in which the Majority Whip of the House was critically injured. Our colleges have become leftist indoctrination centers where freedom of speech and intellectual diversity have been sacrificed to the gods of political correctness. Contrary points of view are shouted down. Our principal newspapers have ceased to adhere to journalistic standards and have become partisan broadsheets, similar to those of the early 19th century.

Summary: the radical Left, in which I include Hollywood and academia, is killing our country.

Where do we go from here? Can the caste war between the self-appointed elites and the deplorables ever have a winner? I see no immediate solution.

As long as the Left believes itself to be a "Resistance," absurd though that is in a democracy, we are in deep trouble as a nation.

27 Comments
HAS A.G. SESSIONS BEEN MOONLIGHTING?
Posted:Jun 15, 2017 9:27 pm
Last Updated:Jun 17, 2017 7:26 pm
254 Views
SEE BELOW: Just to be safe, Jeff should recuse himself in any cases involving the Keebler Corporation!
9 Comments
MAGGIE, THE DAY YOU HAVE AWAITED HAS ARRIVED!
Posted:Jun 12, 2017 10:34 am
Last Updated:Jun 15, 2017 12:45 am
627 Views
Melania and Barron have moved into the White House! Will this at long last stop you from trying to tear the flesh off the First Lady? You have called her a whore, you have called her a gold-digger, you have called her an abused woman too weak to fight for herself, you have posted her nude photos. You have been mad for 6 months because Melania did not "jerk" Barron out of school (to use your crude locution) midyear, even though you bridled at the thought that Obama should have to "jerk" his daughter out of vacation Bible School in the summer (or is that summer madrassa?)

At any rate, I knew your heart would be warmed by this development. FLOTUS Rapunzel has been released from her tower, and she, le petit prince, and the President will play board games and have hot chocolate every night!

Enjoy the photo.


BELOW: The happy First Family arrives at Andrews AFB from New Jersey.

41 Comments
ROTTED LEAF DEBRIS AND THE TRUTH ABOUT FOX NEWS
Posted:Jun 7, 2017 6:55 pm
Last Updated:Jun 10, 2017 6:21 pm
486 Views
The men's room stall inscriber of Tidewater VA is an annoyance, but his counterfactual blog about Fox News is a bit over-the-top. Here is the truth from Variety.

Fox News claimed the top spot in every key ratings measure for cable news in the month of May while CNN and MSNBC saw big surges in those measures compared to the same month last year.
Looking at the primetime numbers for the month, Fox News was number one with an average of 2.24 million viewers, as well as taking first place in the key adults 25-54 demographic with 453,000 viewers. MSNBC was second in primetime with 1.69 million total viewers and 417,000 in the demo. CNN came in third with 1.12 million total viewers and 399,000 in the demo.
In total day, Fox News was first in total viewers with 1.42 million viewers and in the demo with 302,000 viewers. CNN was third in total viewers with 821,000 but second in the demo with 274,000. MSNBC was second in total viewers with 925,000 but third in the demo with 221,000.

Fox News also claimed four of the top five shows for the month in total viewers: “Tucker Carlson Tonight” (2.67 million); “The Five” (2.37 million); “Hannity” (2.36 million); and “Special Report with Bret Baier” (2.28 million). MSNBC’s “Rachel Maddow Show” claimed the number two spot in total viewers for the month with 2.58 million. In the key demo, however, Maddow finished first with 637,000. That puts her ahead of Carlson, who finished second in the demo with 525,000. The other top shows in the demo, in order, are: MSNBC’s “Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell” (523,000); “Hannity” (518,000); and “The Five” (496,000).


Also sprach der Ombudsman.

22 Comments
"HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A FEMINIST SCORNED"
Posted:Jun 6, 2017 8:52 pm
Last Updated:Jun 8, 2017 9:28 am
477 Views
By Suzanne Venker

Perhaps you think Democrats are the most outraged by President Trump, but even they can't sink as low as feminists can. Yes, feminists are Democrats, too. But they're in a category all their own, as Lisa Bloom, the feminist attorney who's responsible for bringing down Bill O'Reilly, proved in spades at the press conference about Kathy Griffin's choice to pose with a bloodied, decapitated mock-up of Trump's head. That stunt was no comedic gaffe. It was an orchestrated and deliberate attempt to destroy a president who left-wing women like Griffin and Bloom believe is a misogynist and thus poses a greater risk to the country than the Islamic State.

If you're shaking your head in awe that the person who made such a colossal error in judgment, as Griffin herself admits (never mind that her attorney subsequently upends this apology by insisting Griffin should be able to create any "art" she wants and thus did nothing wrong), could somehow turn out to be the victim, you don't understand the feminist mind.

Perhaps the country is finally waking up to the enormity of this very powerful and vocal group's hatred of men. Specifically, Republican white men. But really, any man will do if feminists think the shoe fits. Bloom and Griffin honestly believe that since Trump and his family called Griffin out for her actions that Trump is now the perpetrator and Griffin is the victim.

How is that even possible? Simple. Kathy Griffin is a woman. And in the United States, women can do no wrong. Even when they actually do wrong and admit as much, in the end it's still a man's fault. "I've dealt with white guys trying to keep me down my entire career," Griffin said.

Bloom's defense of Griffin's antics underscores the impetus for the stunt: "This was clearly a parody of Trump's own sexist remarks, taken to an extreme, absurdist visual," referring to Trump's interview last year with Megyn Kelly, in which Trump said Kelly had "blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her ... wherever."

Griffin then attempted to explain that what she did pales in comparison to what Trump said during the 2016 election. "I go town to town with my dick jokes and try to make people laugh. I didn't grab anyone's you know what." (For the record, neither did Trump. But to a feminist, a man saying something derogatory about a woman is the same as doing it.)

This entire debacle is about revenge against men who feminists are convinced want to hold women back. That's exactly what Bloom said at the beginning of the conference: that Griffin "never forgot" Trump's sexist remarks toward Megyn Kelly. Men who make sexist remarks must be punished — and Lisa Bloom, along with her mother, Gloria Allred, are right there to dole it out. They consider themselves the voice of women who are too weak to stand up to such men. In response to the hate mail Bloom has received for defending Griffin, Bloom highlighted an image on her Twitter page that read: "The Devil whispered in my ear, 'You're not strong enough to withstand the storm.' Today I whispered in the Devil's ear, 'I am the storm.'"

Well, she's certainly right about that: Feminists are the storm. They can take something for which they are 100 percent responsible and create a virtual hurricane. And at the eye of the storm there is always a man.
"It is Trump who should apologize for his ‘blood coming out of her eyes, blood coming out of her wherever' disgusting comment, which he has never done, and for being the most woman-hating, tyrannical president in U.S. history," says Bloom.

Feminists will stop at nothing — their hatred of men who runs too deep. It consumes them. "Kathy is not going to stop speaking out for women," emotes Bloom. "We will both continue to use our skills to resist Trump. His misogyny knows no bounds."


Suzanne Venker is an author and a contributor to the Washington Examiner's Beltway Confidential blog.


BELOW: "You picked the wrong redhead!" Uh, no -- you picked the wrong career move.
12 Comments

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