| Blogs > starwomyn > un·a·pol·o·get·ically STAR!!! |
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The Dubious Power of Love The EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCES that I Felt and am still working my way through are ABANDONED, He sent me flowers and I allowed myself to feel and believe in Love. I took a chance to the point of relocating to another State. I got here and was treated like an outcast. He left me in a way that left me feeling like he never care for me at all REJECTION because he chose not to be with me inspite of all the efforts I made to be with him... I felt a sense of EMPTINESS that comes from allowing myself to believe in the hope that love, affection, connection and sharing and deepest desires may actually become a reality. I am currently feeling ANXIETY because I am uncertain about the direction that my future is going and If I can ever love and find a man who thinks I am worthy of being LOVED. I have a very strong FEAR that I will be ALONE and unLOVED forever. My Twelve Step Training Tells Me That I Can't Fix Anyone Else But Me. I don't want EMPTY PROMISES - I just want to take Life - ONE DAY AT A TIME. I am actually OKAY ALONE! There are many things that I enjoy doing in solitude. Give me some Battery Operated Boyfriends and A Few Good Hiking Trails and I will Be Just Fine. and THAT is my declaration of independance!!!!  Abracadabra  |
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3/15/2007 11:00 pm |
BOTTOM LINE? YOU WILL BE JUST FINE! YOU ARE OK ALONE! YOU ARE FOLLOWING A PLAN! ALL THINGS WILL COME TO YOU WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT!
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3/16/2007 6:24 am |
Star no you are NOT alone and you WILL find your companion who will treasure and love you..... in the meantime take us here in blogland as your friends..we are here..we read most of the blogs we feel for you and we sigh when we notice despair.... A big hug from far away Kat
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3/16/2007 7:39 am |
You allowed yourself to be HIS fantasy.... He is the looser there. Because he will spend the remainder of his days alone. You eventually will find your mate and don't be too hard on yourself. But let it be a lesson to learn by and NOT repeat itself again. You be the prize that they seek.
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To really live involves taking chances....that is what you have done and are continuing to do....we find what we look for...really look for, beyond our fears....you will find what you seek ...you will...dream it, live it, it becomes reality. Good luck on the journey....a lady with your tenacity will make it happen. RED Some believe in destiny, some believe in fate. I believe that happiness is something we create 
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3/16/2007 10:08 am |
I agree with others here, you'll be just fine hon. Now about that battery operated boyfriend thing....kinda has a erotic ring to it. Shhhh, don't tell anyone I find that to be all kinds of erotic. Cheers!
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3/16/2007 10:14 am |
You are an amazing woman. You are a survivor. I know you will be more than fine.
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